Monday, February 16, 2015

Before I Become Mommy-An Open Response to the Every Day Pressures of Starting a Family


     *  (On a side note, I want to add something personal before I begin this post. For the first two years of our marriage I wasn't physically able to get pregnant even if I wanted to. So when people asked me about babies it would make me cringe or bring tears to my eyes. I have since been to many specialists and thankfully have a complete thumbs up in the female health department. So I wanted to remind everyone that this can be a very sensitive topic and to always respect a woman's feelings and privacy.) *


     Justin and I have been married for four years this fall and I have lost track of the number of times people have asked us about babies. Friends, family, even complete strangers. Since this is an on going question, I decided to openly address it. At first I used to brush it off by saying we had a five year plan, but the truth is-we don't have a plan. And that's ok.

    I feel like I hit the jackpot when I found Justin. I love being his wife. I literally run to the door every single day when he gets home from work. We are best friends and I love this life that we live right now. Not one part of me wants a baby. At first I felt like something was wrong with me for feeling this way. I'm a woman, aren't I supposed to be gaga for babies and want one of my own by now? I feel pressure sometimes to move along to the "next step" in our life. Or that I'm not as mature if I don't have children. For a long time, it made me feel terrible. But you know what? I decided I wanted to live in this step. I love this period of our life and I don't want to rush that. 

    I like sleeping until noon on Saturdays and making last minute plans to go skiing, canoeing or to New York City. I like not freaking out if I forget to meal plan for a couple of days because I know we can just have cereal for dinner. I like random Tuesday night date nights. I like spending a laughable amount on each other for Christmas and not feeling at all bad about it. I like us. I love us.

    Justin and I are growing together. We are figuring each other out. (I just found out a couple of weeks ago that the guy doesn't care for tomatoes that much. What??) We are learning how to tone down our Netflix arguments. (You always get to choose what we watch! Well that's because you can never make up your mind!) We are building a stronger marriage.

    So before I become mommy, I need some time. Before I become mommy I want to hog Justin all to myself. Travel the world hand in hand. Before I become mommy I want to look into the crowd and see my husband beaming proudly at me while I receive my college diploma. I want to become the ironing master and have all of his clothes hung neatly in the closet each week. I want to finally learn to nail his favorite comfort meal, Salisbury Steak. (Help Karen!) Before I become mommy I want to continue to learn to keep our Savior in the center of our marriage. I want to love my husband with the same unconditional, blameless love our Father loves us with. I want to be a better Christian. 

    Before I become mommy I want to soak up this amazing, beautiful, exciting step that we are in right now. I want to be so busy enjoying today that I forget about tomorrow. Before I become mommy I want to be Justin's wife. And you know what? I'm getting pretty darn good at that. 








6 comments:

  1. Love it. Ryan and I waited 5 years before having Henry and it was the best thing we could have done. We did so many amazing things together and really accomplished so much together - schooling, traveling, renovating our homes. I don't regret putting off parenting at all. Love ya!

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    1. Thanks so much, Kim! I think that is awesome that you got to have that time together, and you guys were college sweethearts too, right? So much fun. Those are exactly the things we want to do before we bring a baby into the mix.

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  2. I love this! We were together for 8 years before becoming parents and I don't regret that for a second. We traveled to so many fun places, bought and sold two houses, and enjoyed the easy relaxed pace of just being us. A baby changes SOOO much, enjoy being *selfish* together for a while! Xoxo

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    1. Thank you, Lyndsay! We are having so much fun just being US for awhile. Although you guys make babyville look like a blast, I will say! ;) Hugs!

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  3. Great post. I can relate to you in so many ways. I love it when Phil comes home, and I meet him at the door. I am thankful for the ability to sleep in on days off. I love vacations. I want children, but I love being a wife right now. There's nothing wrong with that. Love the post!

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    1. Thank you so much for stopping by and for leaving a sweet comment. I'm so glad we can relate to one another. These are the best days! Enjoy being Phil's girl! :)

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